sometimes {most times} even i marvel at the ways Buddhism has softened me... opened me. healed me. i still remember the girl/woman who carried fire in her head & spirit... always hungry but never feeling fed... always searching but forever lost. looking for a war or battle to win.
funny that i am still caught off guard when people who "know me" expect "that" me... like they can't quite grasp that i have merged into someone else... no longer seeking war.
i am much the observer these days. acknowledging that in the scheme of things, i know very little. acknowledging my humanness with its limitations & flaws.
recently i recognized that i am STILL after all this living & learning... trying to "heal" folks with my hands & deeds... not with my prayers & meditations. still attempting to alleviate samsara {suffering} with a physical action only to be slapped in the face with reality... the ONLY true means of aiding those we love is by digging deep & invoking life-force to heal them on whatever layer they need healing...
it is beyond a human action. those we love {and even those we don't} need prayer... they/we need Divine Intervention to truly find happiness & peace.
i will set my intention daily to master the Wish Fulfilling Jewel by embracing the lessons of virtue... attaching less to my wounds & heart feelings... owning my responsibility to move us all closer to peace, freedom & happiness.
in the words of my beloved Great Grandmother, Annie Carter Jackson... "It is time to pray y'all"...
Peace & OM!:-)
mechie
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