today, my oldest brother H... just 49 years young... lies in ICU on a breathing machine unconscious... unaware of the fact that his right foot has been amputated & that doctors are considering the removal of more of his right limb & possibly the left… It seems that the blisters that developed on his feet a few months ago, did not heal & the infection has led to this…
I am heartbroken. I am prayerful. I am inspired.
heartbroken because in my brother I am witnessing the reality of potential untapped. Strikingly handsome & athletically gifted, he could have… SHOULD have been great. He was adored by family (the 1st grandchild) & no doubt desired and/or envied by others.
BUT... he has also harbored a lifetime of tremendous grudges & hurt that fueled his venom & anger… he never healed or released life's disappointments. Never forgave transgressions. Never elevated his Spirit. He wielded pain & violence at will... without ever stopping to reflect on the cause or repercussions.
Some of his anger was justified… most of it not… but nonetheless, the strength of it is eating him alive. Hate, anger, venom, fear & rage kill Spirit & when it has consumed everything internally, it attacks physically… destroying the body along with it.
I don't think I've ever seen my brother happy...
For him, I pray that even in this H will see that the Creator is still providing him an opportunity to mend what has been wrong… there is still opportunity for him to attain the greatness that he was born to own… still opportunity to live a fulfilling & blessed life. He CAN be renewed...
For me, as I prepare for my visit… this journey home… I make note to verbally & mentally forgive ANYONE… ANYTHING... that has EVER brought me pain or harm… justified or not.
I am even more convinced & aware now of the power of life & legacy… that life & time is not to be wasted or taken for granted. That every act, thought & deed IS significant… producing karma that will either bring us peace or heartbreak.
I want to live ya'll… to flourish… to grow… to love… to leap into life unrestricted & unshackled..
If you think THIS mechie is a 'freespirit' wait until you see the NEW incarnation in action! though my heart is hurting, my Spirit is rejoicing (thank God for Grace) & my soul is flapping her wings... WIDE.
Please Friends... Pray. Meditate. Chant. Speak… blessings for my H.